Money Management

Many consumers are in financially abusive relationships with banks that are “not that into” them. These consumers are dealing with ridiculously high loan interest rates, very low deposit rates, too many and extremely high fees, as well as poor customer service.

When I was in a financially abusive relationship, it not only angered me, it made me feel weak and hopeless because I didn’t know how or if I could escape. Then one day … I did! I left my “un-wealthy” financially abusive relationship with my bank.

Here are three effective Exit Strategies for getting out of a Financially Abusive Relationship from my book, Financial Fornication.

Exit Strategy 1: Talk About It

The opportunity of improving your financial situation happens by talking with the right person at the bank. So, before deciding to break up with your bank, be sure to …

1. Share concerns with a Customer Service Representative, in person if possible.
2. Speak with a Branch or Department Manager about concerns for resolution.
3. Write a letter to the Senior or Executive Manager about concerns if they are unresolved at the branch level.

If efforts to resolve the matter are not addressed appropriately or ignored, move to the next strategy.

Exit Strategy 2: Start Financial Dating

Begin the process of financially dating other financial institutions to find one (or two) that meet most of your required financial needs (deposit accounts, loans, internet banking, etc.). In my book Financial Fornication, I share in detail the 5 phases of Financial Dating to avoid getting into financially abusive relationships.

1. Explore financial options (banks vs. credit unions).
2. Investigate the financial institution(s) via the internet or word of mouth (research).
3. Experience the Introduction by going to the branch(es) or calling customer service to ask questions.
4. Start slow by Courting the financial institution by using one or two of their financial services (open a savings or checking account), when your ready to make a commitment!
5. After all 4 phases have been executed, then Commit to your new primary financial institution (PFI) by using more of their products and services.

These phases should not be skipped. It is necessary and worth taking the time to get to know financial institutions to make sure they are right for your personal or business financial situation.

Once your new financial “main squeeze” is found, it will make it easier to leave your existing bank.

Exit Strategy 3: Exit Slowly & Deliberately

Whether a new financial “main squeeze” is on standby or not, slowly stop using the bank’s products and services.

Be sure to…

1. Review bank statements carefully to identify all direct deposit or automatic payments coming out of the account(s).
2. Stop or change automatic payments from the account(s) and update payment information with the new bank account information, when available.
3. Ensure that all accounts are in good standing or current. This will ensure a clean break. The last thing you want is a reason for the bank you’re breaking up with to have to keep contacting and mess up your relationship with your new bank “boo” by telling your messy money biz to chexsystems.
4. If possible or necessary, refinance loans to your new money “main squeeze.” If this is not possible, keep this in mind … having loans with a bank is like having a child(ren) with an estranged spouse or mate. Leaving the relationship does not diminish the responsibility of the child(ren). Therefore, leaving the financial institutions does not diminish the legal responsibility of the credit obligation. If refinancing is not an option, continue to make loan payments to your ex-bank on time until it is paid in full to avoid collection and credit report drama.
5. Lastly, stop or reduce direct deposit into the account.

Once these steps are executed, a clean break is relatively easy.

Even though the financial relationship may seem extremely challenging right now, just know that all financial institutions are not the same. There are lots of really good banks and credit unions out there that value and appreciate their customers. Once you find them, some of them even provide an easier method of transiting automatic payments and direct deposits to them through what is called Switch Kits.

So don’t give up. There is hope. And most importantly, you deserve better!

For more tips on how to have a more wealthy relationship with your money, read my book, Financial Fornication on Kindle or Amazon.com.